Happy New Year

   Today my son is celebrating his birthday. We had a conversation the other day about the fact that many people find January a very long grey month here. It is the dead of winter and the joy and wonder (if it IS that for you) of Christmas has past and here we are. It is a new year and yet the month is just so long! For my son, he is excited about his upcoming birthday and so January is a happy month, for others, like myself January is January. 

  This is year two of the global fear mongering about a virus I wont bother to name. The government of the country I live in is doing its best to make as much money as it can off fear using propaganda, lies, and coercion. That first virus laced winter I remember thinking I could make it through because there was the promise of Spring. I, of course, had no clue about what was about to go down and the incredible agenda behind it all. My husband and I have done a lot of research that has had nothing to do with mainstream media (which has proved time and time again to be full of lies). We have learned many interesting things that have opened our eyes and also left our hearts breaking. There is so much evil in the world.

  Living in a first world country in the little safe bubble I have created for myself for so long left me pretty comfortable. I was able to shut out the evils around me that were 'far away' or not happening directly to me. However since I have made the choices I have made around this virus and about obeying orders without question I have had the blinders stripped from my eyes. It has been raw and uncomfortable and terrifying. Facing another year(s) of this feels daunting. However, I have been forced to ask myself so many things about myself (yet again).

  What are my values? Who am I spending time with? Why are certain people feeling they can treat me or talk to me the way they do? What also am I going to do about the answers I find? What it all comes down to for me is that people need love and care. They need connection. Everyone is afraid. It is hard to face the facts that our government is not honest and that it is actually quite evil. It is hard to lose relationship with those we have loved for so long. It is hard to feel like no matter what we do we are being punished. Yet times marches on and even in feeling like this illusion of control I had has been stripped away there is so much I CAN CONTROL!

 I can control what I say, what I think, what I eat, how I move. I can control what I watch and what is coming into my mind, and how amazing is that. And so I can then say....Happy New Year! There will be SO MANY happy moments. Last night as I made my fifteenth celebratory desert for my son. My miracle boy, my first child after uterine cancer, the son who is so sensitive and loving and such a good brother. We went out together (four of the children and I) and picked candy to decorate the cupcakes and buy the streamers and they were all with me. Even though the masks and signs and fear were all around us we had each other, and there was laughter and thankfulness. 

 So I know this was a jumble of thoughts but I want to end it with... May you have a hand to hold this year. May you have many hands to hold. May they lift you up if you fall. May they wrap around you if you feel sad or hopeless. May they bless your soul.

Happy 2022

Bless you

Oh, and isn't it so wonderful that Spring always comes!!!!

Tansy