A Memory of a Mountain

 

My son and husband climbed up the mountain we can see on our drive home and it reminded me of the time we decided the night before to do this hike as a family. We had ZERO idea what we were getting into and it was such an adventure. We had never been on a family hike before. Our youngest had just turned three. 

A Memory of a Mountain

I come around a curve in the road

Driving home

And there it is

A towering mountain peak

Tall enough

When you stand on it

You can see the ocean.

One day our whole family 

Climbed up

And up

Step by step

Through meadows of glory

Past a small lake

Past strangers who felt kinship

In the thinner air.

Down in the valley all was dry

Barren

We had almost forgotten lush green

As humans so easily do.

So up we climbed

Through brilliant green

Up to the blue. 

Closer to God Himself

Well, that was how it felt.

Maybe I could finally reach

The hem of His garment 

And be healed.

At the top

We gingerly looked out

Across the valley, over other mountains, holding children' hands

Eyes eager for the view of our reward

Somewhere down down below

Was our house

Our life

What victory to climb a mountain

With your family

How symbolic of our life

How hopeful

I ached for days

Muscles remembering

Heart full

Another Weekend of Craft Fairs

  My children and I went to two craft fairs today as the rain poured down and it never truly felt like daylight arrived. One of the craft fairs was held in a building that has seen soldiers train for world war. We didn't find anything to purchase there but across the road was a gentleman dressed in bright yellow head to toe rain gear. He faithfully covers every part of his house and a majority of his yard in Christmas lights every year. Today he was working on his electrical pole. His house is like a beacon and it exudes his creativity and exuberance for the season. I had not seen him closely before so today I looked at him as I drove away and saw that he was a man of considerable years. He starts his decorating early in November and adds to it all through the months of November and December. Every portion of his roof is covered in lights, every part of the walls of his house are as well and he has wooden reindeer on his roof. This is not an easy or quick labor of love. I wanted to ask him his story. Why does he do this and when did it start?

  The next craft fair was in the Evergreen Hall. Before life was like it is now, community halls were a place the community gathered regularly for many things. They still are in this day and age but somehow it is not the same when a town gets so large. Today though it felt like a moment from the past. The hall was filled with cheery music, Christmas decor, and so many people. Each of my children found treasures as did I. There was a lady who had made the sweetest felted purses, animals and coasters. There was a lady who had filled fine china tea cups with a wee plant, fairy and mushrooms she had made. There were crochet stuffed animals, smoked salmon, a lady who made you a custom charcuterie box full of snacks, pottery, painted art, bedazzled art, wooden creations and more. My oldest daughter, my grandson and son in law arrived and I asked my son in law to teach me about a table filled with fly fishing lures. You learn new things every day. I came home wishing to create something, to decorate my house with lights. My husband took my children to the river to collect rocks for his next creative creation. 

  There are many dark days in life of course, many dark hours. Today was happy and light even though the sun never shone. Today felt victorious and important. I don't take that forgranted. 

  It isn't even December yet but the Christmas season has already brought warmth and joy to our home. Having a baby who finds the world wonder filled and delightful helps everything as well. She tiptoes into my room to see gifts being wrapped and exclaims in awe and excitement. 

 Next weekend we will venture forth again to another small community hall up on a mountain to once again enter into the joy of a craft fair ~ I can hardly wait.

Grateful

All my life 

I've wished to feel

Like I was connected

To someone enough

That my soul could stay in my body

That I felt loved

So knowingly

That I could be enough

Just as I was

Just as I am

Now I know

It's a gorgeous wish

A vital wish

The life giving hope of a child

My eyes wide with looking

Finding the ones who saw me at a time

And cared

And here I am now

Looking out my window 

At the Roses, the field of velvet green

The misted mountains beyond

Grateful

To them all 

Moss

 The whispers of moss

I could not hear

Though I have tried to quiet myself enough

The color like your first bite of ripe juicy plum

Warm from the light of the sun

Vibrant and verdant and rich

Tiny fingernails of it on gnarled fence posts

Whethered by relentless wind and clawing rain

Thriving and clinging 

Drawing an ever searching gaze

Bringing eyes delight and whimsy

My mother gathered moss

And keep it on her table

She wanted to hold close a forest path

A memory of peace

Be surrounded by the whispers of moss

Though she too couldn't hear

Life was shrieking so loudly, relentlessly

There are those of us

Who listen for moss

Who's eyes are drawn up into the trees or downwards all around

Widened with delight

Irises taking it all in

Hand reaching, a fingertip caressing

Moss

My First Craft Fair of 2025

   I am excited to announce that I went to my first craft fair. It was a Christmas craft fair and here is the best part....I went with two of my sisters! That was so special for me. I had my two youngest children and my sister had her two children as well. Every craft fair is filled with people who have worked HARD and are presenting the fruits of their labor. The spirit of creativity is in the air and eagerness to bless you with what they have made is everywhere. 

  A gentleman dressed as Santa gave my baby a handmade wooden ornament for free and it blessed her little soul so much. She was so sweetly happy.

  My sister bought my six year old something she was wanting and I would not buy her and her cousin gave it to her. This also blessed her sensitive soul so much. 

  I bought two snowmen from the hospital auxiliary. They were adorable in their sweaters and scarves and hats and they were sharing skiis. I have not bought many Christmas decorations. They are all given to me from my grandparents houses. I love them so much. My one grandmother had a few snowmen and it brought me joy to add some friends to the collection. 

  I bought a handmade wooden tree and a little handmade wooden rattle. I bought beautiful lace snowflake for the Christmas tree. I try to buy them every year. Once again, a craft fair brought me joy and I was so thankful for artists who give their time and creativity. 

 I have other craft fairs to attend this month and I am excited about them all. 

 I hope whoever reads this has some creativity and beauty to look forward to and partake in before the year ends. It it such a soul filling exercise. 

Life Feels Hard

   In some parts of the world it is the height of Spring and in some parts of the world it is Hurricane Season, some parts of the world are getting snow and here where I live, there is a lot of rain and grey hazy days. However the last two days have been sun filled. The leaves this year have been incredible in their hues of color and it feels like this celebratory upwelling to fill your soul before the grey of winter hits. I keep gazing at it, asking it to fill my soul full to help me through. 

  Since I live near an ocean and rain forest areas we don't often get a lot of snow ~ there are grey days over and over and over again for months. People here develop seasonal depression. If you live in a cramped house and it is loud and people have over taxed nervous systems....it gets a bit much. I am dreading it this year more than most. I have a toddler who is in the height of making her wishes known and she has a lot of them and they are made known loudly. I have an eleven year old who run on such high emotional alert and is so easily triggered it is very challenging. I have a child battling crippling depression and anxiety right now and I am trying so hard to keep up with everyone but I more often that not am letting people down.

  However, I am not cleaning up from a massive hurricane like my dear friend in Jamaica is. I am not going to be cleaning up after animals and feeding them during deep snow falls. I am simply going to be here in my home doing all I can to help all these little ones who need me to be their compass. This is a blessing. I keep telling myself I didn't sign up for an easy life. Any person who has children has not signed up for an easy life. Throw trauma and anxiety that is chronic on top of it, and all the other challenges our family has, and it makes things what they are.

  I wish I had better words to express how I feel. I blog for others but I also blog for myself. I look back and see what I have experienced, what I have learned, how we have moved forward or fallen back. Right at this moment in time, November 2025, life feels hard. Back in November 2023 life felt pretty overwhelming as well. The theme of my life is that a lot of things feel daunting because they actually are. 

  However today the sun shone and its light made it into my living room window and before that I attended church and the sun shone through the windows there as well. My two little girls had dressed up as dancers and were full of joy and celebration of that slice of their day. The sun was on them, their hair was illuminated and their eyes shone. It was pure beauty. For a short time everything lifted away and I could feel the light and the joy so fully. 

  If life wasn't hard a lot of the time ~ maybe that moment would not have been so important to me ~ but it was so precious and I felt the relief of joy so deeply. I think that is what living is truly about. You have permission from your body to feel it all. You walk through the tears, pain, grief, anger, but you also dance through the joy, beauty, freedom and bliss that life also offers. 

 

 

Rejoice

   Have you taken the time lately to indulge in memories that bring joy? If you have not ~ oh I encourage you to do so. The other day I took time to read letters to my children that I had written them when they were babies and toddlers. Those years are full of the cutest memories as they grow and learn to talk and express themselves. It was a reminder of their preciousness, and it left us all quoting their little sayings and reminiscing about when this one cut her curls off; or this one told me they hoped this wouldn't hurt my feelings, but they would like to be adopted! It was such an amazing way to spend a morning. 

  For some it may be remembering a certain loved individual in your life and remembering happy times with them. 

  I loved my grandma and I have these specific happy memories with her that I love to take time to savour. For many of us we have countless memories like this but how often do we take time to actually enjoy them and hold them before us? They are priceless gifts AND they are our story! They are precious pieces of ourselves that are not lost. 

And so, I encourage you to take some time ~ choose a person or a place or an animal ~ and remember ~ savour these gifts of memory and rejoice

Rejoice :)

xo