Travel ~ The Phillipines

 When I was nineteen I was part of a program through a church that took a month long trip to Taiwan and the Philippines. This was an experience of epic proportions from the beginning to the end.

The plan ride was so.many.hours.long. It was important to get up and walk every so often so your legs didn't swell and you didn't develop blood clots. It was a fun plane ride though for me as it was with good friends. I liked everyone on my team. 

When we arrived the heat, humidity and noise hit me like a ton of bricks. We were loaded into a Jeepney which is a vehicle left over from World War Two days. It was a vehicle with a front driver seat and then two benches in the truck bed with a roof and walls but the walls had slits in it. Where I am from you do not use your horn ever, unless you are angry. In the Philippines you use your horn constantly to communicate to other drivers what you are doing. The roads are teeming with vehicles and there does not seem to be many rules to an untrained eye. Pedestrians have zero right of way. It is so full of pollution and noise and heat. When the traffic stops people come up to try to sell you things and you have to be careful not to have jewelry stolen off of you. We had been flying for hours and to encounter this right off the batt was an assault of the sense to the highest degree. We were overwhelmed. When we arrived at our destination we were relieved. The girls were in a room full of bunk beds and the boys were next door in the same set up. 

As we were settling in our room one of the girls let out a shriek as the first cockroach encounter of our lives happened. The boys came in to the rescue and assured us they could not see any more (which was a huge lie to keep up quiet) as the cockroach had run under a bed. Apparently there were many cockroaches under the said bed but we didn't know till later. We then had our first shower experience in the Philippines. There was no hot water and no seats on the toilet. Where we were from every shower was hot and there were seats on every toilet and there was not a single cockroach. 

My time in the Philippines was absolutely life changing and incredible. I loved the country. 

The open air markets were mind boggling to someone that had only been in quality controlled grocery stores. So many carcasses hanging out covered in flies. So many things to buy at such cheap prices. 

The Philippines was covered in litter. The streets were so dirty. Once again I had come from a country where I rarely saw litter on the streets or highways because people were payed to constantly clean and there are high fines for littering. I hope it does not seem like I am being negative or scornful about it. It was just such a vast difference from where I had come from that it stuck out to me,

I saw people defacating in the middle of the streets, and dogs and cats covered in sores. I had also never encountered this in my country. I went to a massive garbage dump where many acres of land was piled mountains high with garbage. In fact the piles were so high that there was an area that had collapsed and killed multiple people. I saw little naked children who lived the outskirts of the dump and who's parents spent their days combing through garbage to find what they could to eke out a living. Once again I had not experienced that here. There are MANY homeless people in my town but none of them are allowed to live at the town garbage dump.  

I stayed at a woman's house whose husband was a missionary for most of her marriage in another country. She had four children many years apart because she only saw her husband once every five to seven years and would then get pregnant. The children did not really know their father. Her youngest son had never met him. This woman was one of a few women that we met in the same circumstances. They stayed back and ran businesses to support their husbands. It was a strange concept that we felt was very wrong. 

We all split up and stayed in different villages. I stayed with three friends in a little village that was beautiful and where many people had basically nothing. I had never been exposed to such poverty before. I remember standing at the top of a hill and looking down onto hundreds and hundreds of shacks built out of cardboard and tin that people had constructed. It was a whole community with chickens walking down the tiny dirt paths between houses. There was no running water or sanitation but people kept their places immaculately clean. The people we encountered were so deeply kind and sweet. They gave what they could. We made food to share and children came running. We also did crafts with them and taught them what we could about the love of Jesus. 

We ate many different foods. I was struck by the fact that bananas have seeds! Since bananas are imported here they never have seeds. Also bananas in their home country are much more yellow inside. They are always white here. A delicacy was chunks of fat floating a broth. When the more picky people on my team refused to eat it the kind Phillipinos just took our bowls and ate what was left. Also a very special meal prepared for us was a whole fish with eyeballs  still in in a bowl. We were so young and rude not realizing how much they were sacrificing to feed us these special foods. When they asked us what a staple food was for us we had no idea what that really meant. We were so privileged. We said bread. They made sure to have a loaf of white bread at every meal even though they never ate bread. I am filled with gratefulness at their sacrifice to my unaware, young, privileged self. I hope I can thank them in Heaven.

In the Philippines one night I stayed at a conference that the rest of my team did not stay at. I was asked to stay by the people there and I said yes. That night I slept on the floor on a piece of cardboard that I shared with a three year old. I have never slept on cardboard again but I had a great sleep that night. 

Being in the Philippines opened my eyes to a different level of poverty I had never seen before. We met a wealthy lady and went to her house. It was amazing to see all that she had when others so close to her, just down the road, were so hungry and had nothing. She was wealthy because her son worked on a ship and was gone for months at a time but made a good wage. We met his wife who suffered from headaches and what I believe was a lot of anxiety. We met children hungry to learn but who did not have opportunity. We so wished we could rescue the many starving sick animals and help the children who so deserved all the chances we had been given. 

We met so many kind people and we ate fresh mangos and hotdogs on sticks poked into pineapple. We shopped in massive malls and in open markets. We swam at a new indoor swimming pool. The ocean was full of garbage and so it was not advised to us to swim. We saw so many different neighborhods and drove in Jeepneys and buses. 

One memory I have that is one of the best of them all for me. I have many memories of this trip that are dear, but it was how I felt during this memory that blessed me deeply.

One day it started to rain. I had never experienced a tropical downpour. Every day had been thick with heat and humidity. Our clothes stuck to us and we felt wilted. One day it started to rain and I was in a small village with three friends. We decided to go outside and walk in the rain. The rain was pouring but it was so bright outside, the air was warm, the rain was warm! It was raining so hard that within a very short amount of time the roads were flooded and water was rushing through buildings. The sewers flooded and rats were floating down the road. People were showering with soap in the rain as many did not have running water. I was struck with the thought of the people whom we had served that lived at the bottom of the hill in their cardboard and corrugated metal structures. I knew their places would be decimated. However there was this sense of elation and freedom in the warm pouring rain that felt unique to me. I had felt that once before as a child in warm rain storm with a friend and we had ran outside and rolled on the hot pavement in the rushing water. It was such a fun surprise happening at the time and this felt the same.

We got soaked to the skin and it felt like this beautiful experience. Then the sun shone again, the rain was done and we went back to the place we were staying. 

One more thing that I remember clearly from the Philippines ~

The Phillipino culture is very affectionate. Where we were from people rarely touched and were not affectionate. In the Philippines it was common to see men walking down the road with arms around each other. In our country that would mean they were in a romantic relationship. Here it was just what people did. It was normal and lovely. I had grown up with very little touch in my life and the girls on my team knew this. In the Philippines they took the opportunity to lavish me with healthy touch. We would walk down the road holding hands because that was accepted and normal. They would stand with an arm around me because that was normal and it blessed me so deeply.

I spent the last few weeks of my nineteenth year in the Philippines and I am so thankful I did. 

Going to the Zoo

  Last night my oldest daughter asked me if I wanted to go the zoo with her and her family today and bring my family. Truthfully I had had a full week and did not want to go. However, I knew for one of the first times in weeks that the sun would be shining, and so I said yes. There is so much power in the word yes and this time yes was such a good choice. See, when I am home I am consumed with work ~ mostly cleaning. My home has way too much stuff in it ~ toys and books and craft supplies. It is such a blessing, but something I really lack when it comes to parenting is consistency in teaching my children to work and clean up after themselves, and so I do most of it. It takes a lot of my time. 

 Today though, instead of cleaning, I got up and made some sandwiches and off we went to the zoo. My sister and her family met us there. The sun was shining but it was cold out. I went through my usual issues at the gate. I can never just line up and get into the zoo. There are always issues that often take thirty minutes or more. Today was no exception. After that though we were in! Today my entire family was there ~ all my children, my son in law, my husband and my grand baby. This is RARE! It was deeply special. My four youngest children also got to go on a little train at the zoo for the first time. My sister brought so much food which was so generous and hot chocolate. This made the trip so special. I had brought water and sandwiches as I was low in snack foods. She even brought a tablecloth! We had a lovely picnic lunch. The sun was shining and so all the animals were out in the sunshine desperate for the light. The Lions, Tiger, Cougars, Giraffes, Wildebeests, Snow Leopards, Buffalo, Zebra, Kangaroos...they were all out. It was the perfect day to go to the zoo. 

These days are what dreams are made of. I am so thankful my daughter got us all out into the sunshine. We were there for a few hours and the sun felt so life giving and the cold air felt so refreshing. We were all full of joy. 

                  

Travel ~ Belize

   I went to Belize. I was a teenager and I took two younger teenage boys there. They were staying in my country but were Korean citizens, and they also had landed immigrant status in Belize. They had to go there every so often to get their passport stamped. Through a random series of events I was chosen to be their guardian on this trip as their parents were in Korea and they were too young to travel there by themselves. My trip was payed for.

Now, I had never travelled anywhere in my life other than a very short plane ride to visit my cousin who resided in the same country as myself. I did not have a credit card, no real proof that I knew these boys, no cell phone, and had no idea what I was doing. I question how my parents felt I could do this ~ but then I realize that my parents let me do what I wanted when I wanted, because they didn't have a lot of spare time to worry about me. 

On the plane we got and headed to Belize. First thought we stopped in Texas and stayed the night there in a motel. Texas was exactly what I thought it would be and it was awesome. My only surprise was that I was from a small town full of mostly white people and in Texas there were so many darker skinned people! I don't know why I didn't realize this but it was something I remember. Texas was hot and muggy as well and I had not experienced that sort of heat before. The next morning we got back to the airport and headed to Belize.

I knew nothing about Belize or where we would be staying. We did not have cell phones as I said before. I do believe I had an email address but I did not email a soul while I was there. When we landed in Belize I knew we were going to be staying on a small island so we needed to catch another plane. The lady in customs looked askance at me as I herded the two boys through her docket. She questioned who I was and how I was taking these boys to this island. It had just had a hurricane and we knew no one there. I was eighteen. Somehow she let us through. We got on a teeny tiny eight seater plane and flew quite low over the most beautiful coloured tropical water I had ever seen. It was a terrifying experience to fly in such a tiny plane but it was also exhilarating. 

When we landed on the tiny island we got out of the plane and the heat was a shock. We got our bags and started walking. We had no clue where to go but we knew the name of the place we were staying. Locals directed us to the building. We were sharing a room. The boys shared a bed and I had my own bed. It was very hot. There was no air conditioning and we were there for a week. 

The first night we were there we ran into some trouble. We had brought money with us but we had to bring enough to pay the lady that was accommodating us. We had to pay for food, and whatever else we were going to do there. The lady who was in charge of the trip had estimated how much to send us with but she had no idea of the prices of anything or how tourists were gouged of all they had. 

The lady who the boys were staying with in my country knew a lady who lived on this island so she was our emergency contact if we got into trouble. We did not have her number though!

So the first night we went out for dinner and ate a normal meal. This ended up costing us so much money that we were now basically broke! From then on we relied on eating one bun from a bakery in the morning for breakfast, drinking Capri Sun juice boxes, and eating Chinese food takeout for dinner. We had to make a collect call to the lady back in my country to beg her to figure out a way to get us more money so we could eat while we were there. 

There wasn't a lot to do during the day since we had no money. After we made the emergency collect call to the lady in my country who had set up the trip she called the lady she knew on the island who then contacted us. She gave us some more money and she took us out snorkelling and to swim with sharks! I had never snorkelled in my life and was not a strong swimmer. This experience was unlike any I have ever had and may never have again. Belize has an incredible coral reef. A garden under the sea. It was so beautiful and magical and vibrant. I saw a huge manta ray and so many fish and coral. I could not bring myself to swim with the sharks but one of the boys I was with did. 

One day I got horribly sunburned. I have red hair and am very fair. An American couple saw me burning and alerted me and left me their bottle of aloe vera. I was in so much pain and sick. That aloe vera was such a kind gift! I remember they also gave me an orange. We couldn't to buy fruit or veggies while there so this was such a treat. Since I got so burned I could not be outside for a few days as the pain was so bad. Our room was very dark and although we had gone to the local library and found a few books in English I could only handle reading for so long.

On this island was one main road with little shops all along it for the tourists. We had already been on it many times to pass the time. Somehow I had met one of the shop owners and chatted with her. After I was burned I asked her if I could help out in her shop. It was very dark and disorganized and dirty. She asked me to clean it. I love cleaning and organizing so I was happy to help! 

Something to keep in mind is that this island was tiny. Everyone there knew how vulnerable we were and that we had no money and that no one was there to care for us. We could have gotten into trouble so easily from evil people but the locals were kind and gracious. We were kept safe. I didn't even think about this until years later.

The first day I worked in the shop I did so for eight hours. I organized a glass cabinet filled with  hundreds of pairs of earrings that looked like they had been tossed in by the handful. Many were not joined in pairs either. The cabinet had glass shelves that were uneven and propped up by books. My first order of business was to take out every pair of earrings and wash down the shelves and then re stack the books so the shelves were even. Then I arranged pair upon pair of earrings on all the shelves. It took me hours. After this I dusted and organized and spent two days working away. The shop owner commented that I accomplished in two days what they would not accomplish for weeks. The process was so interesting as there were no garbage bags or garbage cans and no rags or dusters. I had to be creative. Their pace of life there was so much slower. They would chat with friends for hours during the hottest hours of the day and really enjoy and live their lives. At the end of the few days I worked there she braided my thick red hair in tiny braids. My hair was very short at the time so I looked ridiculous. However it was kind of her to do this for me and took her a long time.

Back when I was a teenager I had a much different view on the world and on saying yes. I wanted to travel, I wanted to experience different cultures, and I didn't live in fear. I am so thankful I said yes to going to Belize. 

Something that struck me about the local people there were a few things. They lived isolated on a tiny island. The children had to go to high school on the mainland and stay there. They didn't get to come home often. I met the shop keeper's daughter and her boyfriend and they were more my age. They told me about their lives and begged me to send them textbooks so they could study and learn more. When I got home I tried my best to do it. However the school I went to would not give me any textbooks and I didn't know how to get any other ones so I could not send them any. I still regret that to this day.

Since they had just had a hurricane the local people's homes were torn apart. The shops had survived and the bigger buildings that tourists stayed in but the villagers homes were ruined. I wondered how they would rebuild because there wasn't exactly a local hardware store to buy supplies to rebuild the huts they lived in. 

The beaches were absolutely beautiful and had the most amazing shells to gather. The water was this aqua color that sometimes changed to an almost jade green. Tourists from all over the world came to snorkel the reef. There were not many cars on the island. People drove golf carts. The store keepers changed their prices every day. I finally called one shop keeper out on it and told him I would only pay a certain price each day for the juice boxes that sustained us and he sheepishly agreed. 

What an experience for an eighteen year old! I kept the boys alive but just barely. One night one of the boys told me he had left our room while I was asleep in the middle of the night and wandered around. There was a nightclub where not good things were happening but angels were guarding him and he was kept safe.  I firmly forbade him to ever do that again but he was fifteen! I couldn't really tell him much. The food we ate was unknown ingredients from a Chinese food place because it was so cheap. The men bent over huge woks with lit cigarettes in their mouths. The ash would fall into the food and sometimes you would bite something crunchy you knew should not be there. 

We got home in one piece and I got my films developed from my film camera and those photos are what I have left to remember my trip. Those boys went home to Korea. One became a dentist and I don't know what the other one became. I have not heard from them in many years. But I can remember how the white sand shone so brightly it hurt my eyes. I can remember the heat of the day and how it felt. I can remember the priest going to all the locals houses on Sunday afternoon as every family sat outside by the water and chatted and laughed the afternoon away. I can remember the colours under the water at the reef and how warm the water was. I can remember. 

What a gift memory is. What a gift the world is.

It holds so much beauty!

xo Tansy

Travel ~ California

 Another trip I took when I was a teenager was to California. I went to another YWAM (Youth With a Mission) base called Gleaning For the Hungry. I went on a very long drive in a fifteen passenger van with a team of other people from my church. We were headed there to serve in whatever way we could. There would be other teams of people there as well from other churches. I remember the drive being very challenging. I was short so I was stuck in the very back of the van with no leg room for a lot of it. The team was varied ages from younger teenagers to people my grandparents ages. 

When we arrived we were billeted on the base and I was in a room with two other girls. We realized that we were going to be working on a factory type line with a very long conveyor belt. This base processed fruit and dried it in the sun to send to places where people were without food. We processed peaches that week. I got so motion sick the first day from the endless motion of the conveyor belt. I was fine after the first day. I was in charge of removing pits. The fruit was processed and at the end of each day the whole conveyor system would have to be cleaned. That took a long time. The fruit would be put out in the sun and dried and also preserved with some sort of spray. 

We worked hard each day and sweated a ton but it was fun. The base had a pool and the couple that ran the base were awesome. The wife made all sorts of pie for dinner I had never heard of like pineapple pie. Getting to eat and chat together was lovely and the YWAM base leader had services and worship times in the evening. We also go to play games and make new friends.  

We met great people during that trip and I learned a bit more about the world. On the way home we visited the church and homes of some of the team that we met on the trip from a part of Washington. It was so fun and so memorable. We didn't do any sightseeing or go to a beach but we did what we aimed to do which was serve. This was such a good opportunity for me and it broadened my horizons. On that trip a boy from California fell in love with me and later came to my town to informally propose. I was already involved with someone else and so it was awkward and I handled it badly. I hate that I did that. I was young and so rude. I hope he ended up finding a girl that deserved him. He was amazing and I was not so much at that time. He was going to go places, work hard, and I hope he was able to thrive. 

Oh the teenage years! The drama and the adventure and the self assurance and sass I had. I am so thankful that I got to go to California and get out of my tiny world and experience something bigger and greater and important. This was the first time I went to California. I was to go again for just a few hours on another trip when I was in my twenties. 

Travel ~ Hornby Island

 When I was thirteen I was invited to go camping with a family to an island called Hornby Island. It was notorious for being inhabited by hippies and free thinkers and artists. One of the strict instructions I was given by my father was to NOT go to the nude beach that was there. 

I went with a friend and her foster parents. The foster parents went every year with their extended family. They had older daughters who were older teenagers at the time ~ basically young adults. 

I have SO MANY memories from this trip. It felt like a sort of coming of age trip. The girl I went with was younger than I was but wise to the world. She was so sweet and the family we were with was phenomenal. I was a very sheltered child in many ways and also was very wanting to obey my parents and make them proud. However on this trip I decided to make some of my own choices that I do not regret and that impacted me deeply.

We stayed at a campground high up on a cliff. I remember looking down onto the water one night and seeing eerie lights in the water. There were divers (a couple on a honeymoon) scuba diving in the dark with lights. It looked so cool! This sweet couple were sleeping in tent surrounded by many other tents and I remember they were badly sunburned and I thought that this did not seem like my ideal honeymoon :)

At this camp ground there were fresh croissants brought in every morning by someone and you lined up at the little store to try to get one. I had not eaten croissants before, much less warm fresh ones, the flakey buttery experience I have never forgotten. 

My friend's foster aunt and uncle were staying on their boat there and we were allowed to sleep in the boat one night! This was a first for me as well. That night we sat on the dock and swirled sticks through the water experiencing the magic of phosphorescence. It was unearthly and deeply beautiful. 

Every day was warm and lovely and the first beach day my friend and I dutifully went to the not nude beach beside the nude beach. Her whole family always went to the nude beach. However the not nude beach was packed with many people and because we were young we had not gone to a beach alone before. It made me anxious and so I decided the next day I was going to go to the nude beach! This was direct defiance to my dad but somehow it didn't feel wrong. 

My nude beach experience ended up impacting me for the rest of my life. We went to the beach on a beautiful day and there were many people there. I didn't feel in any way that it was unnatural or wrong to be there. I chose to wear my bathing suit. It was funny to see people playing volleyball naked I have to admit. And there were creepy older men being somewhat inappropriate but we were with my friend's whole family and they were veteran nudists :) We were totally safe and comfortable.  It was a sandy beautiful stunning beach. We had a really lovely time. The next day however was the most memorable.

We went to the beach again but it was a more moody cooler day. There were not many people there and my friend and I were sitting up in the vehicle staying warm. I looked down and there was a woman dancing along the shore line naked. You could just SEE that she felt winsome and free and full of joy. I was struck with such a clear thought that I had not felt that way, maybe ever, but I so wanted to. I never forgot her.

There was a beautiful house you could see from the shoreline and it reminded me of a favourite movie and a place in it called the White Sands Hotel. It didn't look like the White Sands Hotel but it had the same feel and it was right up above the Ocean on a bluff. I wished I could stay there.

Years later I was pregnant with my son and my friend invited me to go to Hornby Island with her and a few other friends. We went. After we settled into the house she told us we were right up above the nude beach. It was early in the year so no one would actually be at the beach. When we went down to the beach I looked up and realized I was staying in the house I had seen all those years before. It was such an amazing moment. The whole trip ended up being so full of light. I meandered through the most whimsical  pottery houses. I bought the most beautiful spring bouquet off the side of the road. I went to a  free store and found treasures for my family. I ate delicious food and my friend took some photos of myself that I find to be some of the most true reflections of who I am. I was so happy, so at peace, and I could hear the Ocean waves as I fell asleep. I will never forget that time with friends and the peace and happiness I felt there. 

We went to an orchard at sunset bursting with Spring blossoms. There were driftwood houses built all through it for people to stay in and we accessed it through a meandering forest path. The ocean was right at its doorstep. This felt like a piece of the garden of Eden.

We also walked along some cliffs that reminded me of Ireland. The wind whipped our hair and felt crisp and fresh and full of LIFE. We had the best time there. 

I admit that there have been a few times I have tried to move to an island. I have wanted to live closer to the ocean air and be able to spend hours at the beach looking for treasure with my children. I have longed for the feeling of connecting with my truest self that I find when I am there at the ocean and also the peace I feel. I live with such anxiety and tension. However this has not happened and I am here in a valley that has beauty but also has never felt like home.

The memories of my times on various islands sustain me through the years and every time I am able to go back I am just so thankful.

All these experiences have made me who I am and who I am ~

I am thankful to be

xo

Travel ~ Texada Island

 When I was about twelve years old I went to a place called Texada Island with a friend that I am still friends with to this day. I went with her whole family. They went every year. I don't know why I got invited but I came from a family who never went on holidays, never camped, and so this was such a special experience. We were camping right by the ocean. At the time I lived on an island but did not get to spend much time right by the ocean. The first night I remember laying in my sleeping bag on the ground and hearing this pounding noise. It took me a while to realize it was the waves pounding on the shore! The sound was so soothing and rhythmic and loud. I fell asleep to it. The first few days had beautiful weather. We went to a quarry that was stunning in its beauty. We had to hike in and then climb down into it. The water was such an amazing color. I was struck by the beauty and never forgot it. Now you cannot access this quarry as it is on private property and access had been denied. I am so thankful I was blessed with the beauty. I remember swimming in the cold ocean and eating smores by the fire.  I remember that I got to go camping for one of the first times in my life. The rain came quite quickly after we arrived and poured so hard that it was coming into the tent. All of us kids had to be sent home early and the parents stayed a few days on their own. My camping experience was cut short but it provided memories that lasted a life time. I have often longed to once again be back in a tent listening to the waves pound on the shore.

My Homeschooling Journey Part Five

 I want to point out some massive benefits of homeschooling that I have experienced and appreciated through the years.

In year one when I didn't know what to do I was blessed by a teacher who gave me sound and really life changing advice. When you enroll your child in homeschooling here you have the opportunity for a teacher/mentor who also writes report cards for you. You have to do your homework and find the school and teacher that works well with you. I have been so blessed with teachers that have mentored, encouraged and inspired me.

Throughout homeschooling my children have been able to take such beautiful classes that may not have experienced if they were in bricks and mortar schools. They have done dance, outdoor adventure classes, art, gymnastics, pottery, drama, music classes and more. 

Through homeschooling my children have been able to go to the zoo and do projects that have been so meaningful and impactful.

Through homeschool the courses my children have taken have often been tailored to how they learn and the subjects about something they are interested in. That has been such a gift.

Through homeschool I have been able to hire some tutors that have blessed my children and I so deeply. I think I would have suffered massive breakdowns if it was not for them. They have taken my children on such grand adventures, made them feel safe and loved, planned such fun projects for them and nurtured them along side me. I am so thankful.

Three of my children have learning differences to a degree. In a bricks and mortar school they would have had various labels and may have felt quite hindered or maybe not as smart as others. At home they had no real idea they struggled and just forged ahead and learned! They were able to shine in their areas of strength and to grow in their areas they were challenged in.

Even though my own issues have been a big hamper to me personally through these years of homeschooling I have chosen to continue on. My children have had good times and challenging times. I am thankful that we could memorize scripture and poetry. I am grateful that we have all been together so much. I am thankful for each milestone. Every time a child learns to read it is an amazing accomplishment and I got to be alongside them as they learned. I hope that one day I will realize that it does not feel as impossible. Maybe my last two little ones will be able to learn more easily and won't mind book work as much. Maybe I will have more energy to do extra curricular things and they won't have so much social angsts to work through. Maybe, maybe, who knows....

Regardless, here we are. I have been homeschooling for fourteen years. 

Go me :)