When Kindness Changes You

  A few days ago my two sisters and I were at a function together. It was a memorial for someone that we had known our whole lives. We sat together and during this function someone that had hurt us when we were younger was also in attendants and sat right by us. We all felt a deep reaction to this person. It was someone we had never been protected from even though the signs that they had hurt us were evident. All our lives our parents had never protected us and even at this function there was zero awareness about the fact that we might not want to interact with this person. 

I wanted to share something that happened that was deeply impacting to me during this function.

  After the memorial was over my sisters and I were standing together chatting to a dear lady who had been our neighbour when we were children. As she was chatting with us the person came over behind her and beckoned me to come and talk to them. I didn't want to go and my sister explained to this lady what was going on. She immediately without hesitation bristled and asked if she needed to hurt someone for us. Never had anyone reacted with the slightest protection or care (in our memories) about this person the way that she immediately did. We are adult woman and could protect ourselves. She asked no questions, didn't hesitate, or accuse us of being ridiculous. She just was ready to fight for us. 

I want to cry writing this.

It was so impacting! If only this had been our experience as babies or young children or teenagers or even adults. If only...and how might our lives been different!

But it was so impacting in that moment even though we are now middle aged women.

I wanted to remind you about the impact you have with your facial expressions, with your words, with your kindness. You never know the ripple effect of what one sentence could cause for healing or hurt.

Bless our childhood neighbour and bless us and bless the person who hurt us who must have been very hurt themselves growing up. We don't know their story but we can guess it was full of trauma.

Trauma that then causes rippled effects always.

Trauma

Something that does not just go away, that does not just ease out of the body ~ something that stays and hurts until it is processed and released.

I think a bit of trauma was released in that moment because of our former neighbour and her mother's heart and I am so thankful.

xo