Happy Birthday ~

  I did a little update last week and mentioned my husband and I were looking at a place up country to buy. This is not the first time, I might add, that we have tried to purchase property. We did not get the place. It was all a go and then suddenly it wasn't.

  My husband had a job for the last almost two years that he gave most of his heart and soul to and he lost his job this last week.

 There are other things happening in our family that are also hard.

So needless to say this last little while has been especially trying.

 How do you deal with stress in your life? I get anxious and want to curl up in bed and not face reality. Every little thing feels so huge and unbearable down to cooking and cleaning. However I am an adult I try to remind myself, a big girl now, and I have a lot of responsibility. Each day we have all  have gotten through one step at a time, one crisis at a time, but it hasn't been pretty.

Yesterday was a really hard day over all. Anxiety was at a bit of a peak and my heart would not stop pounding and I honestly didn't know how to keep going ~ and then so many beautiful things happened!!!

  I went to a market full of beautiful vendors and their creative authentic heart felt wares with a sweet friend of many years. We wandered around. I saw so many expectant mothers and little babies and woman of all ages. I saw so many beautiful treasures and appreciated that I knew exactly what were treasures to me and why. I could not have said or known that with such clarity in the past. I found an old rock collection box full of amazing rocks for my son and my heart skipped a beat. I knew that was what my money was to be spent on. As I looked around a couple other things called to me one in particular being a woven wall hanging. At the end I found a dress I just had to buy for my pregnant sister as I am going to be taking maternity photos of her soon. As we drove home I realized the heaviness in my spirit had lifted.

  When we got home I went in and went up the stairs to be greeted by a surprise birthday party just for me! It was thrown by my oldest daughter and some sweet friends. It was so magical. Everything about it was perfect. I want to always remember all the details. Some of my friends hadn't seen each other for a while so there was lots of catching up to do. Children watched movies and played dress up and had amazing amounts of fun. The food was delicious. There were stations with all sorts of creative touches for hair tying, nail painting, face masks and more. My cake was one of my favorites. I loved it all. My gifts were so thoughtful and unique and beautiful and I actually got the woven wall hanging I had seen AT THE MARKET!!!!!! When things like that happen how can your heart just not skip a beat? I have wanted a woven wall hanging for probably ten years!!! I can't even really express how each and every gift and card was so nurturing and kind.

  When people that you love ~ take so much time and effort around your birthday to show you how much you matter ~ and take time to express it ~ I feel like it creates this opportunity for so much truth and life to fill your soul if you take it.

  As the party was in full swing I was told that my husband was taking me away over night!!!! So we had to leave everyone and off we went to this beautiful Bed and Breakfast in the middle of a forest. It was so relaxing and luxurious.

  At the beginning of the year I felt the word for this particular year of my life was ~ Peace ~

It has not been the most peace filled year so far ~ but it has been full of opportunity to choose peace. After the market, the party with my sweet friends, and time away with my husband the peace that I am filled with right now is perfection.

 Thirty Six ~ here I come!!!!!