The Turning of a Tide?

 Today was a glorious day.

The Autumn skies here are a kind of blue that make you feel like all the mundane tasks that may feel unendurable are fine. The brilliant scarlet of the blueberry bushes across the field are a beacon. The mountains look refreshed. The air is crisp in the mornings...... and today someone new came over to my house!!!

That may sound crazy. 

Here is the back story.

I am shy. 

I have homeschooled my children for many years. I do not make friends easily which as I have aged has come as a shock and also caused me grief. Growing up I thought that I DID make friends easily and I thought I was a good friend. As time has gone on I have realized this is not necessarily true and I have not known how to rectify it. It has caused a lot of insecurity for me and a lot of rejection. When my older children were younger my own friends, whom I had had since grade school or my late teens, had children they could be friends with. That worked out well and as time went on some of my children made friends of their own as well. However my friends all finished having babies or moved away, and my three youngest children have not been able to find friends they could see with any regularity. I have also been worn down with needy babies that change into needy toddlers and then needy children. I have become so boring and so simple and so isolated! 

I would assume most people could not relate to this? I am not sure. However, all that I have tried in meeting new people and making friends, has not worked.

My seven year old especially does not have a true friend that lives in our town. She has been so lonely and has cried so many tears as have I!! I just wanted her to be able to have a friend to call. I wanted her to be able to play with someone close to her age!

I enrolled her in a little school on Mondays put on by another homeschooling mom hoping that somehow she would find a friend and she did!!! AND today that friend and her mom was willing to come over to our house!!!!!! This is MONUMENTAL! Our house was chaotic as usual. There were two toddlers, a newborn, myself and my oldest daughter, plus my seven year old and twelve year old....however this mom and her two daughters managed it all with grace. It was a breakthrough and I am so thankful.

I hope that this friendship can continue and bring both girls joy. I hope it also breaks whatever this has been over me and my children and new friends can be made.