Autumn Days

 Autumn Time

This year I was not in the mood for Autumn. I guess I mean I felt a bit overwhelmed at the thought of all the rainy days. We are blessed with a house I love but for all of us it sometimes feels a bit crowded on rainy days and a lot of fighting occurs. On a good day in life there are still pressures. Right now life's pressures are hysterical. So fighting and rain and grey skies and being indoors makes for crazy days. I wasn't in the mood ya know? But here is the thing. Something in me just can't help but respond to the call of Autumn. The beauty outside right now is full on. Trees that are sporting coats in three hues, whole hillsides in scarlet and fields in that fresh green that comes after the heat of Summer. Silvery leaves in skittery piles all over the ground or that golden yellow that draws your eye up. Begrudgingly I am loving Autumn. The geese valiantly winging their way through stormy skies towards warmer climates, and sweet Chickadees hopping through bright leaves finding grubs and seeds. The rainy nights are soothing and I've been making soup when I have the energy. Homeschool is in full swing and birthdays are busily being planned. I am thinking ahead to Christmas because that is who I am. I don't want to get caught off guard and with all the unknowns swirling around out there. I want to be as prepared as I can. This Autumn I will not be going to craft fairs again. Our country has implemented something I do not and never can agree with in order to force people to do something they may not feel safe or good doing. These actions have made it so there will be things that I may wish to do but refuse to do in order to protest these mandates by my government. I have been thinking about craft fairs in the past and how my heart welled up with joy amongst the creativity and outpouring of talent and beauty.

 Oh, may your Autumn be filled with something other than stress and rain. May there be crisp sun drenched days filled with laughter where you know that you know no matter what happens love will lead you through. And may that be so. May love lead you through. 

Love Tansy

Freedom

   I feel like I am sitting in my History twelve class learning in much detail about World War Two and the slow process to its explosion. Like I am sitting there in my chair, as my teacher expounds in great detail on the story, and I am wondering how did people not see this coming? How did they not care? How were they so duped by it all? I had trouble sleeping. I envisioned my grandfather so young, so full of it all, just being traumatized day after day, but fighting fighting fighting and not backing down...for GOOD. He believed in freedom. 

 I kept thinking did they not feel the evil creeping in? Did they not see it with their eyes? Did they not hear it with their ears? And how did it come to the time when millions had to die to snuff out the evil? We would never go there again....would we? I foolishly felt a sense of safety. That somehow people would be smarter.

  And now here I sit again, in my car, or on my couch, or in my bed, and I see and hear the hatred and evil that is being spewed forth about innocent people making a decision that has been theirs to make for a very long time because they have autonomy over their own bodies. People who are not deranged, not cruel, not hedonistic, not stupid, not racist, not unworthy....but yet that is what is being said about them. They just might have felt safer to wait a bit longer to see if there were negative long term effects or had antibodies that have been very helpful throughout time.  Oh but they should die, not be allowed health care? These things are being said in newspapers, online, by my country's leader and it is hate. It started out by there needing to be certain strict actions for two weeks to flatter a curve. The curve was duly flattened. 

  Once again as I see people turn on each other, on their families, their best friends, I hear the propaganda over and over again, I am wondering how do people not see this? Not care? How are they so duped by it all? And there are so many thousands of people suffering on such a grand scale on so many levels emotionally and physically. Why are we going there again? Why. Is this really necessary? Are we really that inept?

Wake up oh sleeper

  There are so many lies and hysteria out there and there is much darkness. There is also a lot of logic, appropriate knowledge, wisdom, and truth out there too. Truth brings freedom, truth brings life. 

  I encourage you to wonder, to ask questions, about both sides of what is happening; because this is on a GLOBAL scale impacting every country in the world. I encourage you to not just listen to mainstream media and to ask yourself when you decided that mainstream media and politicians were more qualified to make decisions about your health that have very little scientific backing than doctors who have studied the actual issues being continually discussed for years and years. Ask yourself why doctors are being silenced, why health care workers and many other people are losing their jobs? They are not scary, wild, illogical questions really are they? Why are university professors and police officers and the list goes on losing their jobs over something that has not been able to be studied long term? Why are there ZERO exceptions? Why is there so much coercion and cruelty? Something is going on here. Something dark and sinister, something far greater than meets the eye. It is something that cannot be stood for. Our forefathers sacrificed so much for freedom. It is about freedom. It really is about freedom. 

Freedom

Thoughts on a Old Growth Forest

 Excerpt from my car journal:

   Once a few years ago I stood in a forest where the trees were hundreds of years old. They were so immense, the roots everywhere. They had withstood countless fires and storms. There was such an atmosphere there ~ such a stillness ~ such a communion. There had been so many things these trees had witnessed, and I could feel it all there ~ the lingering of it, and also a steadfast peace you don't feel in a young tree grove. As they grow and their roots grow there is a knowing in them that you can feel. They KNOW all is well ~ they live in wellness ~ they trust and live out that trust. The Ocean lives it out and the age old trees, and who I am ~ this trust and peace calls to me and tells me things I don't understand but simply love. All of us were created to feel it ~ to be filled with it ~ to love without the words. It empties out the dross and gives us glimpses of true light. And when that comes the essence of us and the simple joys we felt when young have a place again. I remember my moments of freedom as a child ~ of deep welling joy ~ and I think it's because I felt a communion that I did not often feel. A communion with the moment and with my surroundings and with beauty. 

A Blackberry Memory

We were walking on a small bridge

The little ones were skipping or scootering or running

And she was commenting about the potential of them falling

And suddenly I smelled

Blackberries

And everything else faded into the background

Back my mind flew to a different day

When I was their age (the ones skipping, scootering and running)

And I wasn't tired and worn pushing a large buggy

All it took was a sweet aroma

To bring me back to that happy moment

A different era

Where nary a cell phone existed

Where there was no internet

We had no TV, not a single screen was in my life

And I was one of the last ones to get to live that life

A different sort of freedom

Where I rode my bike

To a large blackberry patch

With some best friends

Trespassed a little

And picked buckets full for pie,

I felt wistful remembering

Maybe even a little teary eyed

And then I came back to the present

To the bridge

And the voices

 And the children

Flowers...

  My oldest is taking a flower arranging course and we have a few sweet friends who have allowed her to come through the Summer and pick flowers from their gardens....

The Art of Butter Making

 While at the museum the other day my children and I were taught how to make butter. 

Step One: Go milk your Jersey Cow (she gives the best cream) and let the milk sit to separate (aka go to the store and buy high fat whipping cream).

Step Two: Separate the cream (skim off) from the milk and let it sit for a while so it is at room temperature (take the cream out of the fridge for a while so it isn't too cold).

Step Three: Pour cream into your glass canister, set your wooden paddles in that you have previously sanitized in hot water and vinegar, and start manually churning the butter (pour cream into a glass or metal bowl and get our your electric mixers and turn them on).

Step Four: Work up a sweat as you churn and churn the cream first into whipping cream and then into butter (stand holding your electric mixer or if you use a hands free mixer walk away first covering the apparatus with a cloth so there are no spatters).

Step Five: After your arms feel they might separate from your shoulders your butter is probably pretty much ready. It takes about twenty minutes. There will be buttermilk and globs of butter in your jar  (You are still just standing holding the beaters or you are periodically checking on the process).

Step Six: After the butter and butter milk are ready you want to take the butter out of the buttermilk and squeeze any excess liquid out by using a piece of cloth. You then proceed to wash the butter with very cold water. Wash it once and then take a wooden spoon and squeeze any excess moisture from the butter. This process needs to be done few times. If any buttermilk is left your butter will go rancid quickly (you still need to do this step the old fashioned way).

Step Seven: Salt your butter if you'd like it to last longer than a few days and then press it into a butter mold. After pressing it release it onto whatever it will be staying on.

Step Eight: Enjoy your butter with freshly made sour dough bread that you have slaved over on baking day (spread the butter on some store bought bread).

Enjoy :)

One of My Favorite Places

 I have not been to Kilbys for a few years due to circumstances beyond many people's control! We decided to go the other day as it seemed like it might be our last chance for a while. It felt like coming home to myself, and for me and that self, it is the best feeling.