Rejection's Ugly Countenance

  We all feel rejected at some point in life I think. For some of us that feeling of rejection is a lingering nightmare that shrouds us and we are constantly trying to get free. Often we feel like there is a sign over our heads that say, 'I have been rejected and I am easy to reject therefore you don't have to respect me.' How in the world do we get rid of that sign and shrug off the shroud?

  First of all let me just say that yes you may have been rejected but that does not mean that for the rest of your life you need to be the rejected one. It sure may feel that way though and it seems to be the theme for some individuals. I have struggled with that a lot. I still do. However I have seen that over time it doesn't necessarily have to do with other people and their rejection of me...it has to do with how I handle the rejection and where I go from there. I am not sure if I can articulate this well ~ but there have been so many times I felt unimportant, expendable, easy to just put aside until I am needed.

  I am though! I am! I am not saying you do this, or anyone else for that matter, but I create an environment within my world where people know that if they want to just not talk to me for a while, or basically do whatever they want with our relationship I will still be here when they waltz back. I will be open armed in a sense, but a bit more guarded in my heart, but whatever is needed I will be here.... and I am getting mighty sick of it!!
It is nice for everyone else I think, I mean I am not them so I don't know, however for me it sucks.

  I want to have friendships in my life that are equal to a greater degree. I am a giver in general and not everyone lives life like this. Everyone has their strengths. However there are balances in relationships, give and take, and when that happens beauty is created!
Self respect is key here and knowing how to communicate and having the bravery to communicate.

Deep down people long to need to respect others. There is a dignity and grace that goes hand and hand with real respect.

  Lately I have been taking a step back and looking at myself. I have been trying to prune branches so I can grow again. I want to grow straighter and stronger, graceful and giving. I don't want to be withered, hunched, wizen and old. I want to be light. So in that the rejection branches needs to be evaluated and pruned.

Yes I have been rejected many times but that does not have to be my identity. I have been in unequal relationships many times but I don't have to follow those patterns any more.

So we'll see how that goes.

Sometimes change doesn't have the prettiest face but I choose that over rejection's any day.

xo