A Sweet Moment (8)

  When I was twenty I really realized the beauty of touch. Before this I had shied away from it for various reasons. When I was nineteen I became part of an Internship program at a church and around my twentieth birthday I found myself on a trip where I went to places in the Philippines and Taiwan. There was a really lovely group of girls in this Internship program and they came from all different types of families but they were all much more comfortable with touch then I was. During our trip we noticed that in these countries people were SO touchy. Men walked down the road with their arm around their friends shoulder all the time. Girls walked along holding hands with each other as did men and everyone was just friends. It was normal. We noticed it right away because our culture is so anti touch. At first we felt uncomfortable even seeing this.... well, I know I felt uncomfortable, I think my friends felt delight. Seeing so many visible and public displays of touch made me almost cringe. Isn't that incredibly sad? I realized more and more how heart breaking that was and how much this had affected me ~ this growing up with an aversion to touch. On this trip all the girls bunked in the same room almost every night and we had a lot of opportunities to chat. I must of talked about my issues with touch and they all decided to nurture a healing in me in regards to that. I started receiving hugs every day and when we walked anywhere someone was holding my hand. This honestly changed my life forever. I realized the power of touch from a friend ~ someone who was not asking anything in return, just life giving, nurturing, kind, touch and how giving touch with a present and kind heart is powerful.
  When I came back to my homeland and was back in the no touch culture I felt an emptiness and realized how sad this kind of life was. I felt so much respect and thankfulness for the cultures who did feel it was normal and beautiful to snuggle up to your friend and show them care through touch. I wanted to be able to walk down the road holding hands with my friends. It had been so eye opening to observe a culture with a different sense of freedom and how touch brings about so much more openness and joy in a culture. I have not forgotten that and still wish for it.
  I still struggle with touch but I have tried hard to change this in regards to my children. I desire to be present in my hugs, to snuggle them, touch their faces, hold their hands, look in their eyes...because in that sweet moment on my trip (especially in the Philippines) I realized the power and healing of touch.