Change Always Comes

  How do you know when it is the right time to do something new? It is almost always our choice to make a major step and change things up. I moved twice in my childhood that I remember. Both moves made a big impact on me. I was not the most easy going child. I was pretty sensitive and did not love change. Any big change made me feel apprehensive and pensive and worried about what was to come. I still struggle with that. My husband and I have moved seven times in almost fifteen years. We have always lived in the same town and always lived in the same area of town but some of those moves have been really challenging.

  I find now that I live in a state of always thinking about moving. I feel so aware of the junk drawers filling up, the closets getting too full, all the things that make moving intense. I am far from a minimalist but I am also not one that has crazy amounts of things ~ but that is according to my North American standards. I do have a lot.

  I am thinking about this because my husband and I have this crazy dream to own acreage. If we wanted to buy ten acres here in our town with a house on the property with a suite on it that would cost over a millions dollars. In order for us to buy acreage we have to leave town and move to a much smaller town hours away. I homeschool my three oldest children. The two oldest have special needs funding and learning is actually hard for all three of my oldest children as they all have dyslexia among other issues. The thought of moving out of this town and trying to get started somewhere else is daunting to me. Yet I feel like there is this calling in my heart for farm life. Why? Is it crazy. It seems like it most of the time.

  However I know that change will come ~ because it always does. Nothing ever stays the same. Most days I am okay with it but some days I can't bear the thought that my sister might move away and I will hardly ever get to see her in person or that my other sister might move out of my house. That my children are not babies anymore and that they are going to be spreading their wings and one day leaving the nest! I am not borrowing trouble, really I am not, I am just aware of what I have right now.

  So change will come, we might not know if it is the perfect time to make the leap, we might just do it. We might go through really hard times because of our choices or we might really be blessed. We just don't know. What we do know is that change always comes. Each day there is much to be thankful for in what we have right now. The baby that doesn't sleep at night but loves you so so so so much that you can't leave them for more than twenty minutes? Change will come before you know it and they wont need you quite so much. Your time with your parents ~ and all of those you love ~ is not forever.

  I am reminding myself to attempt, in my anxiety and some times unreality, to be present and to be thankful.

I hope you are doing well
xo