It's a Grey and Misty First of September Day

My sixtieth post on September 1st, 2015. It is misty and cloudy and the mountains are that dusty cobalt blue shrouded with mystery. These are the days where I know the Sasquatch exists out there somewhere :) (What???Where did that come from.... ??? Its a long story) The grass is already looking more velvety on our lawn. The land here has been thankful for the sustenance of rainfall. Many people however have been affected by the wind that has been ripping around for a couple days here and there. We have not had any issues which has been a massive blessing, but thousands have been without power. We are so incredibly reliant on electricity. Without it we are lost.
With this new month comes some insecurities and fears. I am not greeting this month quite like I greeted the last one. I want to feel happy and excited about this new season, but our summer has been so lovely. I feel like most days were crazy but I mostly managed. When I 'manage' I feel amazing! I accomplished some things I had hoped to also with my children and it feels so good to have done so. My eight year old gained so much confidence ~ it was a miracle.
 This was my first summer also where I knew the official diagnosis of my two eldest children. I went to a geneticist this last week and he asked me what I had gained the most from all the testing we have undergone in the last year and a half. I told him that I felt more confident now than I ever have. That I can now confidently tell people to back off and let me parent. I feel like I have been such an overwhelmed mess as a parent. I was so blown and tossed by other people's opinions and had no backbone. I felt so immature and ridiculous!  Now that I understand what my children are going through and a bit about how their brains work I USUALLY feel more able to manage it all. However, there is the small, teeny tiny issue of school starting. Change is not usually gleefully embraced around here. We have just been getting into the summer groove of relaxing and getting along and now its over. I will have two children homeschooling and that will be that but I will have one child in school also. It is going to be really wonderful I know it. There are just so many unknowns involved in change. So many things that cannot be controlled. To some that is the most exciting challenge that they strive to bring about in their lives. In others, like me, it can be terrifying. I am not terrified this time around. I am just aware and prepared. It will be our first full school year with all the diagnosis in place. It will be the first full year of me knowing what I know about myself and my children. It will be the first full year I have confidence under my belt. Control has to be set free. We'll see where that takes us.
So September, here you are. I think we are as ready for you as we can be :) So welcome.