I have been preparing for Christmas, and Christmas as a mother to a family is such a marathon when you have hopes that your family will feel cared for and thought of is it not? I remember a few years where my mom felt she just could not go through the motions of 'doing Christmas.' She had five children and worked full time and my dad was not very functional in aspects that related to making memories special. The full weight of responsibility fell on her. She also did all the house work in the home and the cooking and so adding Christmas on top of that with all the shopping and planning must have been absolutely monumental. She only had Saturdays to shop and there was no Amazon back then and she had to grocery shop every Saturday. As I look back now, and feel what I feel about this coming holiday I totally one hundred percent understand why she had to take some years off! I don't work outside of the home on top of raising my children. I am very grateful for that in many ways. However the wish to make a holiday meaningful, memorable, warm, happy and more for me involves a lot of planning and praying and strategizing and this is the story for every mom out there ~ and how blessed is she if there is a dad equally involved. I feel like maybe though the mom is the one who more often carries that responsibility.
I wonder if it's really as big of a deal or as hard as my head and body make it out to be? Let me see....
For example ~
I just needed a family photo to send in Christmas cards because my husband decided this was the year he really wanted this! I just needed to coordinate the outfits of everyone for the photo and schedules too. I needed to plan hair cuts in advance and hair do's and make sure all the clothes were clean and stain free. I needed to have bribes for the little ones in case they decided to try to have hissy fits. The weather was causing drama till the very last minute. It actually poured rain on us so we had the shortest family photos in history ~ and they were perfection and brought me so much joy.
I just needed the Christmas cards to send the photo in. Well, look at me go, I bought those last year on sale and they are sitting waiting to be written in. I just need the time to write a good many cards and address them and stamp them. Oh look, once again I bought many stamps a long time ago just for this time! As for the time to write them? That happened on a weekend when I locked everyone out of my room and wrote furiously. I still have a few to write but I got a majority of them done and mailed!
I just need to plan when we will have our little celebrations and what we will do at them and what we will eat. Okay so Christmas Eve ~ wrote my list. Christmas Day ~ wrote my list. The 27th ~ wrote my list. I have about fifteen pages of lists and I am not kidding!
I just need to figure out what to put in stockings for ten people and also what gifts to buy for them that are practical, but wanted, that will keep them entertained on that day, and that will warm their hearts. No big deal, so easy ~ and also what to get for friends and family that feels personal and caring and thoughtful. I also need to figure out how to afford this and how to be wise in my huge desire to give!
Oh! The Christmas tree! Better schedule a day everyone can make it up to the farm. Don't forget the tiny traditions we have around that too.
I just need to wrap all the gifts I amazoned while the baby and six year old wail outside my door the entire time. My room is overrun with all things Christmas so I trip, with my arms full of laundry, over a box and fall and bruise up my leg like maybe I am in my late nineties.
I just need to go get the tree at the Christmas tree farm that we have gone to for twenty two years. No matter that it has not been maintained well for a few years now and tree pickings are slim. No matter that my husband's back is out and he can't drive or cut the tree down. No matter that my six year old is feeling very emotional and wants to be carried but my two year old needs to be carried because of the long grass and many stumps and my husband can't help. No matter that my eleven year old has fallen and scraped up his arm and is very disgruntled. No matter that we have walked far and wide looking for a tree but we are going to pick one of the first trees we saw. Just keep breathing and talking in a cheerful voice, snapping photos and enjoying the mountains all around. Really, this is a dream come true, and I can remember when my oldest, who is present with her husband and baby, often had tears on this particular day of the year for multiple reasons and now she is grown and wants to be here and has made the day so lovely! I acknowledge to myself that even in the screams of the six year old and the happy gurgles of the almost one year old, and the scowls of the eleven year old ~ I really do want to sing The Hills Are Alive With the Sound of Music and twirl in my bulky coat because this is really SO HAPPY!
I just need to get the tree homes safely and get it decorated ~ try not to worry to much about the baby smashing a precious ornament that was her great grandmothers. Just let that magic happen and remember to barricade the tree with the coffee table at all times to keep the babies safe from the tree. Was it last year or the year before your teenager managed to have the fully decorated tree topple on top of her? Enjoy the few seconds the tree is fully decorated and even has a few candy canes on it because you know that ever after this moment the bottom half of the tree will be naked and nary a candycane will survive.
Wow it's only December 4th and all this has happened! I am on it! I am well on my way to creating a magical Christmas for all :)
I just need to start the Christmas baking ~ don't forget that. Since I am celiac now, as is my six year old, I will have to figure out what Christmas baking is going to look like. Do I bake double of everything since baking gluten free is so expensive? Do I want to bake at all?
Oh! Don't forget to do Advent that my precious sister set up for us all to do each day! Don't forget that really all of this is about celebrating Jesus coming to earth as a baby!!!!
Through all this don't forget that you have multiple appointments every day for all the children and hey, make sure you ask your husband if he will coach your daughter's basketball team because there is no coach. You know YOU can't do it, and you know he knows nothing about basketball, but why not add that into the magic of December ~ and yes ~ he says he will, bless him!
Also I have gone to a craft fair every weekend in November with my children but I know perfectly well I do so much less than many many mothers.
So what is the point of this post???
I am in awe of mothers and grandmothers and great-grandmothers and all those who put so much effort and planning into Christmas and all the other holidays. It is so.much.work! It is so much time and energy and money! It is so much LOVE just poured out and poured out from the most beautiful cup possible.
I will keep on ~ I will work hard ~ I will do my best
And I know there are so many out there planning their elf on a shelf escapades, planning vacations, planning how to have their houses hold all the family members coming to stay, planning how to do the special Christmas activities like skating or skiing or gingerbread house making and more. I don't put lights on the outside of my house or a wreath on my door and my Christmas decorating is minimal! I don't have a lot of traditions to uphold or special foods I must make. I know so many of you do! It is just the most beautiful most kindest thing!
Keep up the great work all of you! Know that what you are doing is important.
I am so grateful for all my mom and my grandma did for me growing up ~ the gingerbread men decorating, the paper chain making, the gifts to open, the delicious food, the cousins to visit with, the carols to sing, the Christmas play or choir to be in ~ all of it
So much work and effort
AND LOVE
Happy December
xo
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